Rachael Ayres is a lifelong learner, wild dreamer, sourdough baker and traveller who loves solitude, words, ideas, fibre arts, walking long distances and spending time with family and friends. She is a member of Auckland’s Titirangi Baptist Church.
It’s Thursday morning just on seven. There’s a steady stream of folks nipping in to the café for a coffee to-go. Even more crowd the tables, reading newspapers, scrolling on phones, chatting in hushed tones appropriate to the early hour. At one table are three ladies in their 50s. It’s been three months since we last sat here together. Back then I had asked, “So what’s new in your world?” and one replied, “My mum’s getting married in three weeks”. I wasn’t expecting that. No-one was expecting that!
This time we talk about spending money. The three of us have always wanted to honour God in everything we do, and we’ve all been responsible – not wasting, spending intentionally, giving generously.
In our 20s we all thought about owning a house. One did what was seen as the responsible thing and bought one, but because her husband had been to Bible College she knew they might be called to sell it and become missionaries!
“Sell everything and come follow me” was a challenge I grappled with. I wanted to obey God completely, to come under the lordship of Christ. I came to the realisation that Jesus was speaking to a particular young man, rather than stating a universal command. My husband and I bought a modest house, holding on to it lightly, not wanting it to become an idol holding us back from full surrender.
None of us have sensed a leading to sell everything, but we know friends who have.
In fact, I recently had dinner with a couple-who-sold-their-house-because-God-said-so. And what were we talking about? House maintenance, renovations, leaky church buildings, stewardship, knowing when to act, knowing when to stop. Thirty years on and still asking the same question: how does the way we spend our money and time reflect our devotion to God and what He calls us to?
Back in the coffee shop, we chewed over the same question, but this time in the context of holidays and life plans.
Some people set five-, 10-and 20-year goals and actively work towards them. ‘If you aim for nothing, you’ll hit it every time’ said CS Lewis in his book Mere Christianity. None of us have operated that way (which might be okay because we don’t actually find ourselves achieving nothing). We’ve all done whatever’s in front of us, tried to be faithful in the little things, taken the next step, and the journey has unfolded before us.
The one time my husband set a 10-year goal (less formal than it sounds: he mentioned at dinner one night that in 10 years’ time he’d like to be doing a job that used his engineering skills and his language acquisition learnings, not a common combination), he went to work the next day and someone had put on his desk a newspaper with a job advertisement circled in red pen. It was his dream job, right there, 10 years early. He got it.
One of the ladies at the table in the café had prayed about and researched taking her family on a mission trip to a particular place. One day when she was home sick, her kids came back from church all enthusiastic about a mission trip to a completely different continent. They went.
They never questioned that trip; it was about service so of course it was good.
More recently all three of us have taken trips with no purpose other than rest and enjoyment, which gave rise to questions. Is this selfish? Is this the best use of our time and money? Should we be giving that money away instead?
Then I find myself sitting, again at a table, this time at a wedding reception, across from a couple who have just moved back to Auckland after years away. They are asking themselves where they will live, which community God is leading them to and how best to care for an ailing mother.
They are asking that same question: “how do we best follow Jesus?”
I am so grateful to have had friends who have actively looked for answers to that question. People who challenge, probe deep, not shy away from tricky conversations, suggest alternative ways of seeing things, speak loving truth, wrestle, grapple, wonder, ponder, be iron sharpening iron. As a teen I prayed, “Lord, would You give me people who will help me to walk with You”. He said yes. What a treasure it is to have some friendships that are now decades-long. Equally special was meeting a new couple when we were all in our 50s. How unexpected - new friends after 50! God was continuing to answer my prayer as we, in community, continue to seek His ways.
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