Shelley Motu’apuaka is the pastor of Whangārei Baptist Church.
International Women’s Day (IWD, 8 March) is a global day to celebrate women’s achievements, educate and raise awareness about women’s equality and call for positive change advancing women. We asked Shelley Motu’apuaka to reflect on her experiences in leadership with women, including her younger self, in mind.
Dear You,
Sit down.
It’s okay.
Just sit down.
You are not weak; you might just be tired. Did you remember to eat today?
The church won’t know if your desk isn’t clear at the end of the day and there are fewer ticks in your ‘completed’ column.
The world will not end if the washing isn’t washed, dried or folded.
Dinner can be toasted cheese sandwiches, no one will die.
You are more than what you have achieved - or not achieved - today
Tarry a little longer in the mirror. Not because your shirt is buttoned weird, but because you are too quick to run away from all the ‘imperfections’ that you see, and nowhere near as quick to find the good put into you.
Linger longer there, until you see the value and the design put into you, created in you, becoming still.
Change the radio station while you are there and learn a new song, one of your belonging and beloved status; let’s get rid of the lie that ingrains itself and has found a home inside you.
You are more than what you have done or will do for another, a friend, a future child or husband.
You are not completed but complemented by any of those things of love.
Sit down,
It’s okay,
Just sit down.
These words strike at you because you are so willing to give away yourself; to go the extra mile and minute to prove yourself and you wriggle so uncomfortably in rest.
Uncomfortable and not persuaded by the true words of your Creator who tells you:
‘Fearfully and wonderfully made’, ‘Come to me, my yoke is easy'.
You hear others’ words and believe them, so why not those? There is nothing to prove with Him. He knows you already, has chosen you already.
Sit down,
It’s okay,
Just sit down.
Remember if you can, that ‘we have been given everything we need to live a good and godly life’.
It's yours already, granted ahead of time. Your needs are not unknown, your name is treasured.
You are a one-time purchase with no need for an exchange card.
So generously given to - ‘that you may participate’, not own, create or perfect, but to participate, prospering under and in His presence.
So,
Trust me when I say - for I only echo words given by greater than me -
Sit down,
It’s okay,
Just sit down.
Sit down with me.
I know that you see the spider web in the corner of the kitchen,
And I know that poppa has worn that same shirt to the last eight church events.
I see that too. What of that lady? Do you think I don't know about her?
No, it's not time to clean the fridge at church (and should you be doing that?)
Yes, the policy needs to be reviewed, but there is more than one pair of eyes in the church
Sit down,
It’s okay,
Just sit down.
Sit down with me.
Photo: Woman sitting on the beach by Porapak Apichodilok
